Gift from the Sea - book review

I had to read a book and write a review for my human relations class.

Gift from the Sea

Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Delicate, beautiful, graceful – these are just a few words that come to mind when I think of seashells. While I have always admired seashells, it never would have occurred to me to write a book comparing shells to different stages of human relationships. That is exactly what Anne Morrow Lindberg did. The book, “Gift from the Sea” was first published in 1955. The descriptions of women’s lives might be a little outdated, but the concepts used to describe relationships are timeless.

            The book was conceived and written while the author was on a peaceful vacation by herself on Captiva Island, on Florida’s Gulf Coast. She began writing as a way of clarifying her own thoughts on a pattern of living for herself. I love the opening paragraph in which she comes to the realization that we are all under an illusion that our experiences are very different from other people’s.  As a person who loves to write, I have also come to that conclusion when I begin writing something with the belief that it is a unique feeling or thought and then slowly recognize that others can identify with me.

            By the time they are washed up on the shore, seashells can seem quite fragile. But people need to consider what the shells have already endured, living in the sea, being tossed around by the waves and victimized by other sea creatures. Now there are many other adjectives that come to mind to describe them – strong, stable and often, literally full of life. The excitement of finding an undamaged seashell explains to me why they could be considered ‘gifts’ from the sea.

            Writing this book, Mrs. Lindbergh found her inspiration in the seashells she collected during her walks on the shore. The first one is small and simple, and was once the home of a whelk. This is a shell one can choose, but eventually abandon when choices bring with them more complications. Next is the moon shell, which seems to represent solitude. This shell reminds us that we all need some solitude in our daily lives. This is a concept that many women have a hard time with – as they strive to fill every minute with tasks or entertainment. I know a lot of people who are not comfortable with being alone. Perhaps they should examine a moon shell and contemplate its simple beauty. Anne Morrow Lindbergh took each shell home with her, as a reminder. Of the moon shell she had this to say. “You will remind me that a woman must be still as the axis of a wheel in the midst of her activities; that she must be the pioneer in achieving this stillness, not only for her own salvation, but for the salvation of family life, of society, perhaps even of our civilization.”

            The third shell the author used is the double sunrise shell, which she describes as “two flawless halves bound together with a single hinge, meeting each other at every point…” This chapter was my favorite, and the one I identified most closely with.  I know in my own seashell searches it is rare that I find both sides of a shell that are still connected. The “hinges” get broken or worn away. This is the way I see relationships. It reminds me that we are all individuals and the things that hold us together must be cherished and taken care of. Every human relationship is temporary, fleeting.  Every relationship has to endure changes and life stages.

            The oyster shell is used in the book as a depiction of the middle years of marriage. The author talks about how the oyster has small shells clinging to its back, and compares it to couples in the growing years of marriage, struggling to achieve a place in the world.

            The last shell in the book is the one of the Argonauta. The Argonauta is not attached to its shell, but free to float away and start another life, much the way we, as humans have to come of age on our own. There are others to help us along the way, but the choices and decisions are ours to make.

            Haven’t we all collected shells from the beach? There is something about them that draws us in. We know they are special without thinking about why. We keep them until they break or we outgrow them. We do the same thing with the people we meet, the friends we collect as we struggle to find our way each day. As we grow and change we find that we need to leave some things, and often, some people, behind us. Reading this book helped me to see that this is just the way life is and it isn’t something I have to be constantly sad about. I loved this book and I know I will read it several more times. I need the reminders in my life – because I’m not always good about letting things go.  “Gift from the Sea” had me searching old boxes for my own forgotten shells. I now have them where I can see and appreciate them. My reasons for enjoying them have been forever altered by the words of Anne Morrow Lindbergh. I wish I could buy a copy of this book for all of the people who will be forever in my life, and also for those who are just passing through.